Awh, puppy love

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_edGZgGebFM

Thursday, April 28, 2011

My name is Janey.

I knew something was great has been happening. God is revealing Himself to me. Doubts of a creator existing are being put to shame, in some of the simplest of ways. Just when I think He doesn't care- He shines through once again.

This is a good story, so let me tell it right.
I was walking from my math class into the main building at my school. My school is fairly small, 600 students for both middle and high school, so a new face is easily detected. I had school on my mind, but couldn't help but notice this unusual looking woman standing under the trees, admirably smiling at the landscape.
"These trees are just so beautiful...wow! What kind of tree is this, do you know?" The woman turned to a teacher standing nearby.
"Maybe poplar? Not sure, mam."
Why is this woman so impressed with a tree that you see everyday here in the South? Whatever, I gotta get to class. I took another look at her and couldn't help but notice there was something different about her. She looked black, but not quite. Perhaps it was her clothes, they weren't exactly the most stylish. Whatever it was, I didn't have time to think about it. I brushed off the thought and went on into school.

Later I went to go study at the picnic tables, around the same area I had just seen her. I noticed she was sitting about ten feet from me, so eventually I felt inclined to speak to her. I leaned over and told her I hadn't seen her around before, she smiled warmly and soon after the conversation went from basic small talk, to discussing the matters that have been weighing on my heart deeply.
How sweet, you opened up to a complete strange. No. I never said a word regarding any of these issues...somehow, she already knew. As we're sitting there, she's staring me straight in the eye, speaking straight into my soul. A portion of her conversation went like this:

"Honey, don't even worry about college, because you know what? If you put it in God's hands, He will direct you in the right way. You just have to have faith, you have to let it be in His hands, He knows what school fits in his plans for you, He knows what career you can best serve Him in, and He has your best interest in mind. But you know what? As soon as you start taking it into your own hands, it will be a disaster. You won't go to the right school, you'll get stuck with the wrong career- everything will go sour. But place it in our Creator's hands, and somehow...somehow everything will work out according to the goodness of His plan. And that's how it is for when it comes time to choose a mate for life. God knows whose going to be in our future, but it's when we take it into our hands and we tell God that we know better, that everything becomes a disaster. Just like when we take college into our own hands! The Lord has someone out there for you, but just put it in His hands...and He will take you exactly where He wants you. And when you walk into that room to that science test, give it to God! You just throw you arms up in the air and declare it to the Lord! You've done your best, and God will take care of the rest! He will give you the grade that fits into His plan for your life!"

At the time, this stranger telling me this seemed very normal...it crossed my mind only briefly how she knew to tell me that. How did she pinpoint exactly what's been bothering me? I didn't have long to wonder because my best friend, Madison, came running up and sat down next to me. I saw the woman look at us both and smile.
"You are both very beautiful girls, but be careful not to...."
Then she proceeds to look straight into Madison's eyes...addressing the very issue that she has been struggling with. Pinpointing everything she needed to hear... I carefully watched Madison's reaction, she politely smiled but I could tell there was more taking place. She asked us our names, and when Madison told her, the woman smiles, almost knowingly, nods her head and repeats, "Madison. Nice to meet you, Madison." I told her mine, and the same knowing smile appeared, "Kaitlin...good to meet you." I wish I could explain her smile...it was so warm, so genuine- it was a feel-good kind of smile.

Madison and I went back to studying, but the woman's words were ringing in my ears. We looked up, and the woman was gone. Maddie looks at me, "Kaitlin, there was something different about that woman."
"Yeah, she was...odd."
"I liked her." Maddie confidently said.
"Me too. I don't know how she knew all that stuff to tell me..."
Stunned, Madison hadn't realized that before she sat down; the woman had spoken directly to me. After telling Maddie what she had told me, her jaw dropped open.
"Kaitlin! That's like...everything that's been haunting you! How did she know? Did you tell her?"
"Maddie? How did she know to tell you all that she did? I may be crazy....but there's something more taking place right now than we're realizing. And notice, she's gone." I looked around, feeling chills go up my spine. Madison just sat there, agape.

Later, I looked up from my textbook and saw her sitting there again, this time with her hand in her hands, on her Bible; obviously deep in prayer. For some reason, I wanted to get a picture of her. I took out my phone, and quickly snapped a picture, with her right in the center. When she lifted her head after prayer, I couldn't resist asking her name. She took a moment before answering, as if carefully considering what she should tell me. She smiled, and slowly said, "I'm..Janey."
Immediately, I knew that wasn't her name. No one pauses like that to say their name, it's just instinct to answer immediately.
"..Janey?" I asked, looking at her closely.
She smiled again, tilting her head up a little, and nodded. "Yeah, Janey.." As if to reassure herself.
We walked away. Madison grabbed my arm. "That is not her name, girl!"
"You're right. Her name isn't Janey. But I don't think we're ever going to find out who she really is..."

I went through the rest of the day, wrestling with the idea of who she really was. I went over to to my friend Dilshad's home, whose a foreign exchange student here at my school. Typically, our conversations aren't two-way deep. I'll help her with a spiritual element she may be wrestling with, but mostly it's mindless chatter about who-did-what at school. Though, sitting there on her floor I suddenly felt very inclined to tell her about Janey.
"Dilshad, I met this woman today. I've never seen her before..." I proceeded to tell her the story, she stared at me wide-eyed, nodding her head.
"I've met her, Kaitlin. I've met her."

Dilshad proceeds to tell me her story, about how she was sitting in the library at school, diligently working when all the sudden this woman appears out of nowhere and begins talking to her. Just like me, she had a hard time recalling exactly how the conversation went but before Janey 'disappeared' she pulled a packet of purple paper, folded up, and laid it in front of Dilshad.
"I think you might like to read this." Janey smiled her warm smile, and then 'disappeared' again.
I asked Dil if she had read it, she said she hadn't, but jumped up on her feet and ran and got it. She threw me the paper, half laughing, half grimacing at the uncanniness of it all.
"Read it to me."

I opened it up, it was a chapter out of Ephesian's with somebody's annotations on what each verse meant. I read a few of the sentences to her, and glanced over to see what her facial expression was. Her eyes were wide-open, obviously contemplating the entire situation.
"I think I might need to read this... How did she know..." Dilshad almost shuddered, but then turned to me, "Kaitlin? Do you think she was...I'm going to sound crazy....but do you think she was an angel?"
I don't think I'll ever be able to answer that question with 100% proof, but when I got home- I looked at that picture I had taken of her on my phone.
"Where is Janey?" Everyone asks when I show them the picture. I wonder the exact same thing. Where is Janey, but who really was Janey? 

I looked up the name Janey on the internet, and with a Hebrew translation, the name means 'God is gracious'. Sounds pretty angelic to me.